A marriage and family therapist has gained significant popularity online for his unconventional dating advice. Known on social media as @therapyjeff, Jeff Guenther is the author of the book "Big Dating Energy: How to Create Lasting Love by Tapping Into Your Authentic Self". Recently, he shared advice on what not to do in the initial stages of a relationship.
What Should You Avoid at the Beginning of a Relationship? Rushing Is a Bad Advisor
The beginning is usually the most exciting stage of a relationship, and many people wish it could last as long as possible. During this time, we're often overwhelmed by strong emotions associated with falling in love. Our judgment can be clouded by these feelings and the butterflies in our stomachs.
However, we shouldn't lose awareness of the decisions we make, as Jeff Guenther warns that this can have serious consequences. The therapist reveals that one of the most common mistakes made when a relationship is still developing is rushing. We tend to make quick decisions like moving in together, setting up joint social media accounts, or planning trips together. According to Guenther, we should hold off on these decisions until we know the other person better.
What Are the Early Stages of a Relationship Like? Be Careful with Serious Decisions
The therapist notes that the intoxication of love can sometimes lead a couple to decide on marriage. Jeff Guenther advises waiting on the decision to walk down the aisle until the "rose-colored glasses" come off and the initial infatuation fades. It's easy to make mistakes because, at that point, we don't fully know our partner's flaws. Additionally, in the early stages of a relationship, partners often try to present the best version of themselves, shaping their image in the other's eyes.
Another mistake we make during the early stages of a relationship is adopting pets or deciding to have children. People in love often forget that these decisions come with significant responsibilities and obligations, and in the event of a breakup, the consequences can be traumatic. Finally, the therapist advises against rushing through the initial phase of getting to know each other when the strongest emotions are at play. It's better to savor every moment of this stage rather than making serious decisions too quickly.
