Agnieszka and Julia got married almost 10 years ago at the Katowice Registry Office. They met in 2009 while attending Old Polish literature classes. Two years later, they decided to go on a date, and since then, they’ve been inseparable. Now, Polish law is putting their marriage to the test.
Polish Law Clearly Defines What Marriage Is, and There Are No Exceptions
According to Polish law, marriage is a sanctioned, permanent, and equal union between a man and a woman. These rules have remained unchanged for years, which means same-sex couples cannot marry in Poland. But what happens if, after getting married, one of the partners undergoes a gender transition? That's where things get complicated.
When Agnieszka and Julia got married in 2015, Julia hadn’t yet publicly come out as feeling like a woman. Only Agnieszka knew. "Julka told me about it in the second week of our relationship. We hid it for years. We could only be ourselves at home," she admitted in an interview with katowice.wyborcza.pl. Both women felt uncomfortable during their wedding ceremony. "Standing in front of the official, we listened as they said that marriage is between a man and a woman, and that the head of the office would defend this like national independence, pointing to the eagle on the carpet. It felt like a comedy," the women said.
Julia "Came Out of the Closet." Not Everyone Took It Well, and Updating Her Documents Is Complicated
Over time, Julia started explaining her situation to family and friends, and the reactions were not always what she had hoped for. After receiving a sexological opinion, she was able to start hormone treatment. This also raised questions about how their marriage would function as a relationship between two women.
In her ID, Julia is still listed as a man, and formal transition, which includes legally changing her gender on documents, requires a court ruling. Aside from the challenging process of presenting evidence (such as doctors' and psychiatrists' opinions), once approval is granted, the women would have to get divorced. This is because, as mentioned earlier, Polish law defines marriage as a union between a man and a woman. Julia and Agnieszka are thus facing a painful decision—either they undergo a forced divorce after Julia’s legal gender change, or they remain married, but without the possibility of completing the transition.
Many couples in Poland face similar struggles. Some have even decided to file lawsuits against the Polish state in hopes of compelling the country to allow marriages regardless of gender. Julia and Agnieszka are also striving for this goal. However, they acknowledge that it could take many years to achieve favorable results. "We don’t want to settle for half-measures, and above all, we don’t want to divorce," they said.
